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Apparently John L. Hess thought these recipes were so appalling, that it was a fake book written by Democrats to make Republicans look bad? Or maybe he was being sarcastic (he was a food critic after all, and many of the recipes look downright weird.) Either way, enjoy this delightful document of Propaganda, and take it with a grain of salt!
Hess\'s letter in the NY TIMES in 1973:
Hon. Leon Jaworski,
Special Prosecutor,
Justice Department,
Washington, D.C.
Dear Honorable:
It is my understanding, and I am sure yours, that you have engaged to hunt down dirty tricks of 1972 no matter which party cooked them up. Regretfully, I must call your attention to a ragout that has all the aroma of a job by the Other Side.
It is a document called “National Republican Heritage Groups Council World Cookbook: Featuring Congressional and Cultural Achievements,” or “NRHGC Cookbook” for short. Although dated “Summer, 1972,” it has just been surfaced by something named Atland Publishing, with a letter drop at 2300 Pennsylvania Ave., NW, and a price tag of $4.50, plus 35 cents postage.
The cover‐up is preposterous. NRHGC is obviously a slyly mocking title for a minorities council purporting to campaign for Republican candidates for Congress. No observer recalls such a campaign from Pennsylvania Avenue in 1972. Further, had this document been published then, it would hardly have helped the Republicans.
It is not calculated to help in 1974, either.
The frontispiece is a clever parody signed “Patricia Nixon.” Under the White House seal, “Mrs. Nixon” writes:
“Cooking is truly an exciting, yet so extremely practical skill! It is the basis for happy meals and sound health for your family as well as an opportunity to exercise your personal creative abilities. This cookbook is especially interesting for it is a collection of recipes that are riot only delicious but also representative of our great nation\'s many ethnic and national groups.”
And so on.
“Mrs. Nixon” submits the first recipe, Continental Salad, which is an aspic of lemon or orange Jell‐O, canned grapefruit juice and canned beets, with a dressing of cream cheese whipped with more grapefruit juice, mayonnaise and sesame.
This confection gives itself away by its excess. Much better, because almost plausible, was the legend that Mrs. Nixon\'s husband relishes cottage cheese with catchup. If that was a Democratic canard, this one\'s a canard à l\'orange Jell‐O.
The second recipe is signed “Judy Agnew,” and the hand of the Democratic Segretti here is just too crude. It is a poor man\'s version of the great Greek avgolemono soup, using a full cup of rice and three eggs for one chicken, where a richer and better version uses only yolks, and one‐fourth as much rice.
The chicken is removed to cool in the second sentence, and never returns. The voter gets the rice soup. Who got the chicken?
“Tricia Nixon Cox” submits a “Chicken Imperial”—another sly dig — of chicken breasts, bacon and corned beef, baked in cream of mushroom soup and sour cream. Those canned mushroom or celery or chicken soups return again and again in recipes attributed maliciously to various members of Congress, including a “gourmet” witches\' broth of 20 ingredients pinned to Senator Javits.Segretti in his most prankish mood laid nothing so foul against the Democrats.
While the author of the “NRHGC Cookbook” was careful to sprinkle a number of reasonably authentic recipes representing some of the smaller ethnic groups, the Mexicans come in for a particularly hard time, with such recipes as “green chili casserole” tagged to poor Senator Gordon Allott of Colorado; evaporated milk, 2 cans cream of chicken soup, grated yellow cheese...
Senator Clifford Hansen of Wyoming is accused of spreading blue cheese on his Imperial—that word again—Tenderloih, while Mark Hatfield of Oregon is said to use cornflakes in his Deviled‐Crab Casserole.
Your own boss, then Senator William Saxbe of Ohio, is smeared with a recipe for lemon cake: “1 package white cake mix, ¾ cup Crisco oil, 4 eggs, 1 tsp lemon extract, 1 package lemon Je11‐0....”
Note that brand names are sprinkled liberally, if you will excuse the expression, throughout the book, doubtless to implicate big contributors.
Note further that Senator Weicker is not listed in this goulash, while it smears such loyal if lower ranking Republican Congressmen as Page Belcher of Oklahoma and Norman Lent of New York. Can\'t you see the opposition whispering about Belcher\'s Peas, Pickle and Peanut Salad? And how can Lent live down his Hot Dog Stew, with its can of bean‐with‐bacon soup, can of tomato soup, can of mixed vegetables, can of condensed (sic) milk and “onion flakes to taste”?
The victims may deny everything, but if you throw enough mud, some will stick.
Note finally that it was a Democrat who said, “If you can\'t stand the heat, get out of the kitchen.” This was in the White House, and there is, in fact, some reason to suspect that the Democrats never did leave its kitchen.
How else can we explain that travesty when President Nixon served Brezhnev good Maine lobsters gucked up as homard en Bellevue? When Brezhnev had the Nixons in, he had real Russian grub, not pseudo‐French, flown in from Moscow. The Soviets won the round hands town.
Cynics will say that you can\'t make an omelette without breaking eggs, and will try to shrug this off as election propaganda. But I am confident that, busy as you are chasing Republican improprieties, you will not let the Democrats get away with this. What\'s sauce for the improper goose is sauce for the impropaganda.
